259 14th St
The Malibu Diner is well appointed for Christmas. There's a tree, holiday music, and decorations hang from the ceiling: snowflakes, peppermint candy, and ornaments. It's festive!
The water was very, very good. The coffee was acceptable. Okay, that's it for the make nice. The Malibu Diner pie was clearly refrigerator damaged. Would it be too much to ask that the exposed edge of the pie be shaved off? The pie was over-microwaved and served too hot. There was concern of scalding the tongue. And the microwaving further affected the exposed edge of the pie. The word "clot" came to mind. Our friend, a physician, had these comments: "The freezer-edge was like a sticky, rubbery blood clot. The ratio of goo to cherry was way too high, and the goo was flavorless. Even the cherries had more like the ghost of cherry flavor than actual cherry flavor, although they were the best part of the pie."
It is a mystery what the goal of the diner pie crust is. These crusts clearly do not even aspire to flakiness. Even Hostess pie crusts seem to be tipping their hat to flakiness. This crust was soggy, and something... we can't even find a word to describe the texture of these crusts. Is it more like bread?
Come on, New Jersey. This pie situation is outrageous. We have yet to taste a single pie we would be happy to try again. Isn't cherry pie part of Americana? Well... turns out the first cherry pie was made for Queen Elizabeth I. Could the hostility expressed through these cherry pies have something to do with a Revolution against our neighbors across the Pond? We know there's a whole world of cherry pies out there. But, for now, we'll continue to explore our little slice. It would appear that we may have to venture away from the venerable diner to find a slice of pie truly worth blogging about. So, stay tuned.